I always wished I could be a little kid again.

And in all those cruel, difficult moments I encountered, I always wished I could be a little kid again. Not because everything was easier when you were a child; not because you weren't responsible for anything including yourself; not even because life was much more simple, but simply because you had all the rights to scream, to shout, to cry your heart out whenever you felt like it without having anyone blaming you for not being strong:

You can wail the moment you feel that you miss or need anyone. You can scream when you're afraid. You can cry when you're left alone. You have all the rights to weep when it's your first day at school and you're alone and terrified from this sudden change that took place in your life. 

If you're a kid, you won't have to fake a smile when your insides are burning just to seem strong and fine! Back then, you had all these rights — until they started telling you that you're a 'grown-up' now and you shouldn't be crying; that you should be strong and responsible; that you might be dying from inside but still you must manage to smile. 

I just don't mind losing that 'grown-up' title if that's all I have to lose in order to regain my childhood life and my childhood rights again. I just wish it were possible. Because having to act as a grown up can be very painful sometimes.