She strode along the pavement, not stopping, not looking back, not knowing where she was going. Her heart was thumping hard, and her jaw was set and tense. The snow had turned to slush, a cold drizzle was coating her hair and dripping down her neck. But with every step she felt a little better. With every step she was further into anonymity, away from the shocked faces of her family.

Her whole body pricked with anger .She’d never witnessed such an ugly family scene.She closed her eyes she felt raw and vulnerable , not ready for this. People would surely expect her to answer question, to reassure them and help them digest this piece of startling information .But she had barely digested it herself .

Her condition was a nebulous fact floating around her mind, unwanted and uninformed, as yet presentable to the outside world. She couldn’t articulate what she thought about it, could no longer distinguish between emotional and physical sensation. She was still confused .She still wasn’t sure what it felt like? To have a child inside you? But she didn’t want to answer that question. She didn’t want to think of herself as carrying a child.

She stopped in a corner and cautiously laid her hand over her stomach. When she imagined whatever was inside her, it was small; it was like a small shellfish, or a snail.  Something coiled up and hardly human something indeterminate. It was another day older. Another day more developed. Perhaps it had features by now. Perhaps it had little hands, little toes. It was a boy or a girl. A little person, growing inside her. Whose life had not yet begun. Whose life might, if she chose, progress no further.  A wave of strong feeling, half grief, half sickness, swept over her, and she began to tremble. She had to decide whether another human’s life should go ahead or not.

The thought transfixed her. She felt almost overcome by her burden, overwhelmed by the decision she was going to have to make, for a moment she thought she might collapse, sobbing, on the hard pavement. But instead, with a slight impatient shake of the head, she thrust her hands deeper into her pockets and, teeth gritted, began to walk once again.

 <a href="http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/7378405/?claim=4heb64cfvb6">Follow my blog with Bloglovin</a>

You are everything !!!

As a kid, I was dreamed about falling in love with a prince, who would come in a silver shining armour, and gallop away with him on his horse into a hazy, peach orange sunset. I waited for so long for that dream to come true and in the end it did . And that moment felt like a fairytale !!

It felt like a million angels had decided that I was good this year and deserved someone amazing - YOU !! You make me feel like the happiest girl alive every second of every day.You make me feel like there is no other, like you are the only one I will ever love. And I know deep down in my heart: you are the only one I will love. And the only one I ever plan on Loving.

I can have a really bad day one day, and you can just text me and I forget what I did that day and I will be so happy, you make my day a hundred times better and no matter what you say it just makes me feel so good about myself. And every time we talk it feels like my stomach is doing non stop back flips and my heart beats like crazy just by hearing your amazing voice ....  

You always compliment me in every way possible, and I write them down and read them and smile and think ' what good have I ever done in my life to deserve someone like you .. someone who is so amazing !!! ' . Before I go to sleep you always say "Goodnight, Sweet dreams , sleep tight " It makes me feel so good... you make me have premature ventricular contractions !!! you make me skip a heart beat ...

Love had become just another word for me until you gave it a definition, and you have...you are my love till the end... nothing makes me feel different unless it's more love, and that is every day and every hour and every second... you are my love , my only love... for today , tomorrow and forever ..

You are the only one I can talk non-stop to .. I can talk my heart and then still manage to talk something more to you.. you know me inside out .. even better than i know myself .. you know when i am angry .... you know when i am sad .. and you try so much to make me feel happy again .. !!!! And you also tolerate all my tantrums !! :P and wait for me ... long endless waits ... I really don't know how you do it ... With us it is  fantastic,passionate,scary as hell, scary because i feel so many emotions at one time !!! Literally, one extreme to another...  and also because it was something that I never felt in my life before ...  something so extreme !!!!

But I am happy that I had those feelings, I feel light on my feet, my head in the clouds, I only think of you. Your face, your laugh, ,your soft words, your kisses....I knew I was in love. 

 I love you like stop motion; deliberately and in small increments. Every little bit of you I allow myself comes with a price. I’ve learned I must pace myself with you. I’m easily addicted and you are a poison. Murder has never been this delicious…or voluntary.

 you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me. I am perfectly content to be with you for the rest of my life. I am perfectly content to give you all of me. I love you so much. I need you so much. You are everything to me.

I spend everyday counting the days until we meet... talking to you always brings a huge smile on my face .. without you i am incomplete ... i wish i was there wth you .. but even though your so far away you feel so close to my heart .. i always look at the sky and smile cause i know the sky is something that we both share .. i wish you were near .. bt dont worry .. we'll get through this .. I dream about you .. about us everyday and every night  .. and i'll always be here counting the days until we meet each other ... <3 A lifetime of you is not enough, but it is more than I deserve ! Forever is a long time but I wouldn’t mind spending it by your side. Tell me that everyday I get to wake up to that smile. I wouldn’t mind it at all.  You will always be my love , my shona , my babu , my shonu , my kiddie , my gubbara .. My everything ..

Babu, this is all for you. There are thousands and thousands of words in this post . and every single one of them belongs to you. I thought that if I could form the perfect post, the perfect paragraph or sentence I would be able to convey to you just how much I love you ! But in the hundreds of thousands of words I still haven’t done that. I still don’t know how to craft the perfect sentence structure and choose the perfect diction and word order to adequately express how much you mean to me, how much I need you, how much I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I’ve come to the conclusion that maybe I’ve been over-thinking it. Maybe the perfect sentence has already been formed

It’s been getting harder and harder for me to write here. That’s because what we share together is too precious and perfect for me to capture accurately. My feelings are so hard to put into words. Even now, I’m racking my brain, trying to come up with a strong enough diction to paint a picture of what I feel for you. But I’ll try anyway…
I’m lying here on my bed and my brain is doing that thing again - that thing where it takes a memory of you and amplifies, magnifies, copies, and basically overloads my mind with nothing but you. Now my chest hurts and I have this overwhelming urge to cry because it’s times like these when I want you next to me so badly it physically hurts. I literally ache for you. And I wonder if you ever feel this way too. I wonder if you hurt like I do… I wonder if without me you feel like you can’t breathe. I wonder if without me you can’t sleep. I wonder if you have to fight to get me off your mind. Because I do.
Maybe the only way to sum it all up is in three words; eight letters. 
I love you.

                                                                                                Yours forever,
                                                                                                 Me.

This is my India !!

Good news. I’ve found the answer to life. Bad news! It’s death. A scientific study of 7 billion people of different genders, races and “Which Shah Rukh Khan Movie Are You?” answers showed that there are only two things that we all have in common. We are all “Tere Naam” and we all die. In India, we die more than most, and we do it in style.

There are 1.2 billion of us, most of whom live in deplorable conditions. People die uncared for on the streets. Others look at them and thank the stars that they have a roof over their heads, even though they had to pay six men from the BMC (and the baba who chanted at a coconut and set it on fire for luck) for the illegal house. Which then collapses and kills them instantly. Others join politics to fight the corruption that causes such senseless death, and they do a great job of it, until the day they meet with an unfortunate accident that kills them. But we continue to believe in this totes (short for “my education was a waste”) amazing ideal of India, and we put men at our borders to preserve it, and then one day, five of them die. And then a voice from the other side says “Sorry uncle galti se shot maara” and we tell the kids they can’t play cricket for a few years, and the prince and Cinderella live happily ever after.

We die with such consistent ease in this country that the only way we can deal with it is to turn it into entertainment. A 14-year-old girl dies and a nation hangs on forensic details. A troubled lady hangs herself, and the public glare is so intense that it magically makes Aditya Pancholi relevant again. And natural disasters? Those things are a godsend. The waters in Uttarakhand filled up half the valley and more importantly, every single news programming hole in a one month radius. Finally a wholesome tragedy the entire family could enjoy. Illegal construction along riverbanks! Biblical rainfall! The irony of the faithful paying pilgrimage to the lord!

Armed-force awesomeness! It gave us so much to bullshit about at dinner parties that we’re still serving leftovers two months later. Narendra Modi rescued 15,000 people. Rahul Gandhi rescued 5 million. And then they both hugged at Baba Siddique’s iftar party.

 Pop quiz :  how many jawans died in Chattisgarh in June? You can’t remember because it was too many statistics ago ! We’re desensitised to death and for once, it’s not pop-culture’s fault, because nobody dies on our TV shows. They just go away and come back as Ronit Roy. It’s not even the news-channels’ fault. They only turn it into entertainment because we’re already desensitised to it and they know we won’t mind. We’re desensitised to it because life in this country kills you. When life is cheap, death does not matter !!

Why not do a reality show? We’ll call it Shradhanjali Idol’s Got Talent Ka Muqabla, and every week, people with hopes and aspirations can be on TV and explain what senseless tragedy they want to die in, and we all get to vote on who has the best, most inspiring tragedy waiting to happen. At the end of the season, we kill a winner and award his family prize compensation money, and our collective guilt is assuaged until next season. I think ratings would be great, finding contestants will be easy

Living Like A Legend

It takes about three minutes to read this post , well according to the statistics, in that same space of time, 300 people die, and another 620 will be born . I might take half an hour or so to write this : i'm sitting at my computer, concentrating on what I'm doing with all books all around me, ideas in my head, cars driving past outside. Everything seems perfectly normal, and yet, during those thirty minutes 3,000 people have died, and 6,200 have just seen the light of the world for the first time.

Where are those thousands of families who have just begun to mourn the loss of someone, or to smile at the arrival of a son, daughter, nephew, niece, brother, or sister ?

I stop and reflect a little. perhaps many of those people were reaching the end of a long and painful illness, and some people are relieved when the Angel comes for them. Then again, hundreds of those children who have just been born will be abandoned the nest moment and will go on from part of death statics before I have even finished writing this post.

How strange. A simple statistic, which I happened to read, and suddenly I'm aware of all those deaths and entrances, those smiles and tears. How many of them are leaving this life alone in their rooms, with no one realizing what's happening ? How many  will be born in secret and then abandoned outside a children's home or a convent ?

I think to myself that I was once part of the birth statistics and will, one day , be included amongst the numbers of dead. It is good to be aware that I will die. I have now finally understood that although life goes on and we are all eternal , this existence will one day end .

People do not think very much about death. They spend their lives worrying about absurdities; they put things off, and fail to notice important moments. They don't take risks , because they think it's dangerous. They complain a lot, but are afraid to take action. They want everything to change, but they themselves refuse to change .

If they thought a little more about death, they would never forget to make that much-postponed phone call. They would be a little crazier. They would not be afraid of this incarnation coming to an end, because you cannot fear something that is going to happen anyway.

And a wise man once said," Death is always sitting by your side so that, when you need to do something important, it will give you strength and courage that you need"

I hope that you, dear reader, have got this far. It would be foolish to be frightened by death, because all of us, sooner or later are going to die. And only those who accept this fact are prepared for life. :)

P.S. Did I ever mention that this topic - Death is my favorite ... because it comes in so many forms .. and yet never fails to take to by surprise ... so take time from your busy schedule and LIVE !!!!LIVE LIKE A LEGEND !!!!! : D

When It Rains . . .. . . .. .

A few days ago life turned even more wonderful. The reason for that was the first showers of this season. Bombay Rains had arrived. Anyone who knows me personally would know that there are a few things in life for which i have undying love for. And rains are one of them.

So here i would like to share with you a few things that i have done in  the Rains and everyone should try them. If not all of them at least a few of them and make this Monsoon season more memorable.

1) Get Wet, wet, wet: Who says adults can’t have fun?  Getting drenched in the monsoon showers, splashing water and jumping into puddles takes you back to your childhood days. But if you really aren't up to getting soaked, simply open up your windows and enjoy the smell of the first rains!

2) Walk by the sea: For those of you living by the sea or a short drive away, take a break from the hustle and bustle of your routine, leave your mobile phone at home and go for long walk by the sea. Don’t forget to stop for bhutta on the way ;)

3)Play football: There's nothing like a game of football in the rain. Sure you'll come home like a mud ball but what the heck! Wear an old t-shirt and shorts, call in your friends and families and get ready to get dirty!
 
4) Romantic drives: Get out of the city and go for a long drive with your partner or a friend or a group of friends . Don’t forget to have cutting chai at a roadside stall while you are at it. P.S. Drive safe   

 5) Hot Snacks : Fix yourself the ultimate monsoon snack - onion bhajiyas and adrak chai. Then sit by the window and enjoy!


6) A day in bed: Curl up with a romantic book or watch a romantic movie while lolling in bed. You can also enjoy the view from the window while listening to romantic songs

 8) For People in A relationship - Rent some movies and snuggle on the couch together, play video games or other games, have a picnic in your living room, talk about any unresolved issues that may be floating around, take a nice nap together, cook dinner together,

9) Order in pizza and have a candle-lit dinner

10) Share a Long warm hug with someone you love.

11) Take a nice long hot water bath in a dimly lit bathroom.

12) Make paper boats and sail them outside.

13)  Tell someone who you are attracted to that you Love him/her.

14) Have an ice cream or if you are a health fanatic then go have a ice gola :)

15 ) Get totally drunk with your friends and then take a walk in the Rains.

My List Of  Best Movies to Watch on a Rainy Day.

1) Kal Ho Na Ho
2) Eternal Sunshine Of the Spotless Mind.
3) Sleepless in Seattle.
4) A walk to Remember.
5) Serendipity
6) Dil Chahta Hai
7) Dil To Pagal Hai.
8) Inception
9) Valentine's Day
10) Titanic
11)Kabhi Alivida Na Kehna

 Songs to listen this monsoon

1) I Wish it would Rain - Phil Collins
2) November Rain - Gunz N Roses
3) Always - Bon Jovi
4) Sometimes when we touch - Dan Hill.
5) Desert Rain - Edward Maya
6) Kahin Toh Hogi Woh - Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na.
7) Zara Zara - RHTDM
8) Barsaat - Adnan Sami.
10) Pehla Nasha - Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak.
11) Bheegi Bheegi Raaton Mein
12) Boondon Ke Mooti - Wake Up Sid! ( my personal favorite )

13)nothings gonna change my love for you - George Benson
14) Tip Tip Barsa Pani -- Mohra
15) Hum Tum -- Hum Tum
16) Koi ladki hain - Dil toh Pagal hain
17)Tum se hi - Jab we met

I hope that all this makes you have one of the Best Monsoons of your Life ever.

Don't forget to comment below and tell me how you spend your monsoon and also if my suggestions helped you.